Heaven

Terry and I have been watching Heroes. Our netflix membership allows us to watch it for free online. We've been putting the computer between us in bed at night and watching a few. They are really good. Very suspenseful (and pretty clean, surprisingly) so they make you want to watch the next one as soon as its over. So we've been staying up later and later every night.

Last night we finally turned it off, way past bed time. We turned the tv on to go to sleep (yes, we both need background noise to sleep) and PBS was having the most wonderful concert. I mention our love of Heroes only to let you know that we were up so late, and my infatuation with this concert might have been half sleep-induced.

I was hooked immediately because my all-time favorite singer was on- Andrea Bocelli. He was singing so beautifully in Italian, and it only got better when he started singing mine and Terry's wedding song- The Prayer.

I realized how appropriate it was that we picked that song to begin our life together. It wasn't a song about how we felt about each other, but a song asking God to be in control of our lives. I realize, in a way, these lyrics could be our Family Mission Statement . It's definitely fitting and helpful to think of concerning our meeting with the Perinatologist tomorrow regarding Caleb's health.

Lyrics to The Prayer :
I pray you'll be our eyes,
and watch us where we go
And help us to be wise,
in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer,
when we lose our way
Lead us to the place,
guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.
La luce che tu dai
I pray we'll find your light
Nel cuore resterà
And hold it in our hearts
A ricordarci che
When stars go out each night
L'eterna stella sei
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
Quanta fede c'è
When shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

We pray that God grants us these prayer requests in life and as parents. We give Caleb to God and ask humbly that we are allowed to love him as a whole and healthy baby.

We were hooked on the concert and listened to the beautiful choir accompany amazing voices like Brian McKnight, BabyFace, Josh Grobin, etc. They sang such religious songs as Bridge Over Troubled Water and the God-focused You Raise Me Up. I was touched and enjoying the smooth voices and beautiful songs till I realized so many singers were directing their songs towards the piano player who also happened to be the focus of the concert. David Foster is a celebrated song writer and each performer sang his song to honor him.

It saddened me that these people who were obviously blessed with God-given voices not using them to praise the Lord or further His kingdom.

And I was suddenly overcome with an image of Heaven. Voices more beautiful and perfect that those on tv. Music more resounding, more fulfilling, more booming than any we've heard. A light-show that brightens the sky, an angelic choir! I was in awe at the thought that our most peaceful and meaningful moments here on earth are only a tiny fraction of every-day life in Heaven.

I woke up in the middle of the night as God connected the dots for me...

If our voices were made perfect in heaven, our minds made pure, our hearts made full, then that means that we're truly made whole. And if Caleb does end up having Down Syndrome then I can rest in the knowledge that it's just temporary and in the end won't amount to anything more than when Micah has a cold. Considering the big picture, when our time on earth is a mere drop in the bucket to our eternity spent in Heaven, earthly sickness and even heart ache are almost irrelevant.

If Caleb were to struggle through life, if Terry and I are to walk a rough path alongside him, I can know that some day we'll talk as equals in Heaven. Someday he'll be made whole.

Chances of Down Syndrome are still slim, but in an effort to understand what life might be like if something this awful were to happen to us, God has shown me how insignificant all these things are. I wish I had the words to fully explain what I mean.

I so look forward to Heaven. I look forward to how wonderful things will be in Jesus' presence. When there is no hurt, no pain, no sadness, no sin. All of those things will be gone because God sacrificed his son in a way I can't even begin to understand doing. Jesus was born in a manger 2 thousand years ago and was later crucified and rose. He did it to heal our hearts and give us hope while we're here on earth. Hope and understanding that frailties and inadequacies here are made perfect in Heaven.

What better Christmas gift could we ask for?