My Name is Mommy

I can be very bitter about the judgments I get for being a Stay-at-home mom. I've been hurt by people infering that had I had an interesting enough career, or had I made more money, that I wouldn't have chosen to stay home. That my decision to be home with my kids is a cop-out, that I chose this path because I'm not smart enough to have a "real" job.

I feel that other SAHM's add to our disrespect when they make comments about being bored, about tasks being mundane, or about getting tired of "doing nothing all day."

And I know that working moms can feel just as attacked about their choices to work outside the home and leave their children's care to someone else.

I listened to an online podcast from Focus on the Family this morning that was extremely insightful. It talked about being called to be a SAHM and they interviewed three moms who'd struggled with the decision, mostly because they had careers they loved or felt like they weren't "kid people." It reminded me of why all moms, regardless of career path, feel so strongly about their own choices and why we're all so darn sensitive and defensive about it. Children are personal. They are an extension of ourselves that we try our best to nurture and, I think, we're all too aware that this sweet, sweet time we have with them to kiss their little cheeks and squeeze their pudgy fingers is so very short.

I can tell you firsthand that babyhood is a blink of an eye. It. Goes. So. Fast. I've already mentioned to Terry that I'm taking in so much more of Baby Caleb than I ever thought to do of Baby Micah. It's one of the reasons I write this blog. To capture memories. To remind myself in years to come of where I was at various points. How I felt at my children's births, when they kept me up all night, when they exhausted me, and when they made me laugh. Like I read in Parenting magazine, if I write down the bad experiences in addition to the good ones, then I'll have no problems of thinking back blissfully to those "peaceful toddler days" when my house is full of teenagers. I've got proof in black and white that sometimes these days are hard.

If you would like to listen to the podcast, click here. It will automatically begin playing today's podcast. Click on the gray tab called, "shows" beneath the blue box. You'll find the first segment of "Bringing Mom Back Home" on page two.

On the program, one of the women refers to her job as a mom as "investing" in her kids. That's why I don't understand when SAHMs talk of getting bored of doing nothing day after day. There is endless housework and keeping your children clean and fed, but to me, the best part of being a mom is just being with them. There is always plenty to do in a day if I think of my job as being WITH my kids. Whether it's taking them to visit my grandma so they can begin to understand family ties, taking them to the park, letting them lead the way at the mall, painting a picture, or helping me cook. My job is to keep them busy and stimulated. The Bible calls for us to be busy wives and mothers. (Proverbs 31 beginning with verse 10.)

Whatever decision women make, with God's direction and the support of their husbands, is not what matters. What matters is all mommy's trying to invest in their children's lives and for other mommy's to hold them accountable to do so. In the end, it isn't about "me time," or household chores, the next big project, or the newest clothes for our adorable children. It's about having a hand in guiding them to God. It's about being WITH them when we're with them.

If you listen to the podcast, I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.

Caleb at three months old.
Micah at three months old.