Allow Me a Moment to Gripe...

My doctor put it best at my last appointment when she said, "This is when most women begin to lose their sense of humor."
Well, Amen, sister. I am beginning to feel like a big hairy man. Allow me a moment to share some third trimester symptoms and tell me if you wouldn't feel the same...

I'm hot. All the time hot. And sweaty. It's November 24 and I haven't needed a jacket once, not once. (This is the most disgusting part of pregnancy to me-and I'm sure also for any of you that have to be near me during a sweat-fest.)

Then there's the:
constant heartbeat
headaches (back with a vengeance)
bloody noses
sore back
swollen ankles and hands
sore feet
thick, coarse, and oily hair (yes, it's a pregnancy symptom)
sciatic pain
uterine pain from stretching muscles
inability to sleep
frequent need to empty bladder (especially when Micah decides to do jumping jacks)
Sheer exhaustion after routine tasks (like how walking up one flight of stairs is enough to leave me winded)

Now, I know what you're thinking, "But, in the end you'll have a beautiful baby and it will all be worth it." I'm sure that's true, but thank you for keeping this remark to yourself during the next 11 weeks.

Other things you can keep to yourselves:

Any remark similar to--

Isn't it too early for you to be experiencing that/feeling that/doing that?
Shouldn't you be experiencing/feeling/doing that already?
You shouldn't be eating that.
Who cares what your doctor said, it's fine to eat that.
Hmm. That didn't happen to me when I was pregnant.


I know that you are all somehow the authority on pregnancy, and I understand that you like talking with me about my experiences because it reminds you of your own pregnancies. And I sincerely hope that once Micah is here and in my arms, I will get the same pregnancy amnesia that all of you got and I will really believe it when I say, "It was all worth it."

Until then, allow me to wallow if I feel like it and don't tell me how I should be feeling. (It's safer that way.)

Stepping down from soapbox.